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shares-a-vest · 3 months ago

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@steddieangstyaugust Day 7: Moonlight

wc: 792 | Rated: M | cw: Smoking

Tags: Steve Harrington Angst, Post-Coital, Aftercare (Kinda, it's more about Steve wanting aftercare), The Beemer, Hooking Up, Undefined Relationship, Angst With a Happy Ending

'Like Clockwork'

Steve shimmies to a seated position but doesn’t bother hitching his jeans up. The Beemer’s windows are all clammy and misted now, despite the clear and warm summer’s night.

He swipes a sweaty palm over the window to reveal a brilliant moonlit night cast out over the abandoned cornfield he parked in. Steve looks up at the moon, resting his head against the cool glass, turning just enough so that his flushed cheek can get some relief.

He still feels hot all over, his body still tingling with after sensations. It’s a feeling Steve has relished each and every Thursday night this summer. Sitting here, all sated and a little sleepy, his own spend drying tacky on his tummy as his partner wriggles about beside him.

No – not his ‘partner’.

Not his boyfriend, either.

Friend? Fuck buddy?

Whatever Eddie is, he is indeed, squirming about like he always does afterwards. More accurately, he is ass up as he searches in the front cab for wherever his jacket and smokes got to.

Like clockwork, he’ll offer Steve one when he finds them. And, as always, Steve will decline with a burning sensation in his throat that runs the length of the fading scar on his neck.

They’ll get dressed with great efficiency, handing each other misplaced clothes, slipping on shoes and tossing anything else aside before they get back into the front of the car. Steve will drive back into Hawkins township as Eddie fiddles with the radio dial and offers commentary about every station.

Then, he will drop Eddie home and watch him skip inside, where the guy surely offers up some excuse to his uncle as to his whereabouts.

Steve will then head home and slip in through the back door to avoid his parents. He’ll fall asleep half-undressed and wake to the sounds of his alarm clock radio with thoughts of next Thursday night. Like clockwork – like he is Marty McFly, or something.

And that’s the problem, Steve thinks as he looks up at the moon.

“A-ha!” Eddie exclaims, plopping back into position next to him and shaking the whole back seat.

He sits close enough that their bare, sweat-sheened arms touch flush together. It makes Steve tingle in a way that is the complete opposite of what happened mere minutes ago. He tears his eyes away from the bright moonlight to find Eddie reaching out, like clockwork.

Steve frowns.

“No,” he says, unable to help the way it comes out, all strained and small.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?”

The thing is, Steve liked it in the beginning. Maybe even loved it. And it’s not like he hadn’t done this kind of thing. He had parked out in this very field in his precious cars plenty of times. Sometimes because his parents were home. Others because every makeout spot in town was occupied.

At one point, it was part of King Steve’s famed repertoire.

And he still likes most of it. The sex. The feeling of Eddie all over him – in him. Filling him up and touching him and giving him everything until it all spills over.

Eddie tosses over his maroon polo (the move that always comes after the offer of a smoke) and Steve balls it up in his fist.

“I want to… Cuddle and... be warm.”

He hates that his voice breaks at the end of it and he hugs in on himself, twisting his shirt up with him.

And Eddie moves closer still and reaches to manoeuvre Steve’s jeans all the way up.

“We’ll go back to my house, Big Boy,” he says as a small, cheeky smile tugs at the corners of his lips when he gets to tucking Steve back into his underwear, “I’m gonna wrap you up all tight and cozy in my bed, even if I have to sneak you in through the window.”

Steve has no idea where Eddie’s pack of cigarettes got to after that. He simply tossed them aside, insisting that he drive them both back to the trailer.

They sneak inside, past Wayne who is asleep in his armchair as an episode of Dragnet plays on the television. Eddie supplies Steve with some makeshift pyjamas – loose sweatpants (black, of course) and a band T-shirt.

Steve doesn’t know the band, but he likes it anyway. Just like the way he feels as Eddie curls in close behind him, holding him tight as he positions the two of them on his cramped single bed.

He thinks he might love Eddie as the guy leans forward and presses a kiss to his cheek.

No, he does love Eddie, Steve knows as he shuts his eyes, their two intertwined bodies illuminated by the moonlight peaking in through the blinds.

#woohoo my first angsty august post!!!#i wanted to do 'hooking up in steves car' but the sadder version #steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #steddie ficlet #steddieangstyaugust

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total-dxmure · 9 months ago

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ೃ࿔ “INVISIBLE STRING THEORY” MASTERLIST

the marines didn’t ruin ellie. ellie ruined ellie. after being medically discharged she feels lost. being sent to live with joel is more of a last ditch effort to save her and less of a fun reunion for the father-daughter duo. jackson is worlds different than chicago, but the fresh air and sprawling countrysides are a welcome reprieve. ellie finds herself finding comfort in more than just the change in scenery though. after losing your girlfriend due to an accident you feel as though you’ll never find love again- but that was before meeting ellie williams. the two of you figure out that you have more in common than just the fact that she and your girlfriend were both marines though. tethered by some invisible string, the two of you meeting has to be fate. who would have known that you were the golden ticket to ellie’s recovery?

total word count: 13.8k

𖦹 chapter one- grief is a difficult thing for anyone to navigate, but ellie finds it impossible to tread through her bottomless depression. all roads seem to lead to nowhere and everyday is a struggle. after a run in with the law after a ptsd episode, her close friends decide that it's do or die. a quick phone call to joel is all it takes to turn her world upside down. moving back to wyoming is a last ditch effort to save the scarred marine. the woman has no idea what's waiting for her back home. . . or who.

𖦹 chapter two- it's easy to pretend that things are normal when she's with joel. she can put on a brave face. grin and bear it, as they say. your sudden appearance in ellie's life hits her like a battering ram, and she finds it impossible not to be drawn to you. joel lets her know that you are no stranger to loss. the two of you seem to have a lot in common. a lost engagement ring, a smitten ellie and a minor mental breakdown.

𖦹 chapter three- you're tired of waking up in bed cold and alone. abby would have wanted you to find joy again. . . so why can't you? ellie shows up bright and early to help you with your duties on the farm, which is when you realize just how irresistible she is. for the first time in a while you feel comfortable to be yourself around someone, and she feels the exact same way. she shares some hard truths about herself and discovers what was once lost to you.

𖦹 chapter four- to be continued . . .

ೃ࿔ fic "soundtrack"

i fall to pieces - patsy cline

i walk the line - johnny cash

big black car - gregory ivan isakov

blue eyes crying in the rain - willie nelson

streets of laredo - marty robbins

plastic jesus - tia blake

almost gone - my terrible friend

death don’t have no mercy - rev. gary davis

i’m so lonesome i could cry - hank williams

god’s gonna cut you down - johnny cash

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pha55ed · 3 months ago

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Pasilyo | F2 (kimi bday celly)

type :: fluff tw/cw :: none contains :: kimi!, paul, pepe, zak, jak request :: beach day kimi bday celly prompt for our one and only summah KING PAUL ARON OFC!! and pepe, zak, jm, jak 🫶 (i have no idea who jm is buttt i know a litttleee bit about jak so this is my first time writing for him!) link to kimi bday celly!

Kimi Antonelli | 04

Going to the beach with Kimi during summer break had to be one of your favorite things ever. Not only was his family super sweet with you, but you got to meet your mini-best-friend, his sister! Kimi loved how well you got along with his sibling, it was always heart-warming to see you bond with her.

As you and his sister played together, Kimi came towards you both. Except, he was swimming underneath the water. This meant that he was playing his favorite game: "shark". Basically, he would go underwater and grab either you or his sister and drag you under.

Although you and his sister hated this game, he always forced you guys to play. As you screamed alongside his sister, trying to tell her to swim faster, you were too late. You watched as she instantly sunk to the bottom as Kimi grabbed her foot. If it wasn't broad daylight and if you didn't see Kimi's ugly teal and orange shorts, you would have been mortified.

You did your best to run away, leaving his sister behind. But you were too slow for Kimi, who was so fast for some reason. If Kimi wasn't a racer, you always thought he would be a swimmer of some kind, maybe a lifeguard. Distracted by your thoughts, you felt a hand grab your foot, you let out a scream. But your cries were muffled as you were quickly pulled under the water and met with Kimi's face.

The only thing you hated about beach days was the lack of PDA that you and Kimi could do. You didn't mind doing small PDA in front of his parents usually, but since you were both in such little clothing it felt 10x times more inappropriate for some reason. Kimi always insisted that his parents don't care and that they're super chill - but you refused to kiss whilst in bathing suits.

Knowing this, Kimi took his one opportunity to do what he's been wanting to do all day: kiss you. Whilst under the water, his hands cupped your face, pulling you closer as he gave you a quick peck on the lips.

Paul Aron | 17

"Paul, I'm literally going to shit myself in the water!!!" You yelled at him, but your pleas were unheard as he laughed. His smile was so bright that you'd rather look at the sun instead of his pearly whites. Although you begged to not go for another round of surfing, Paul insisted that you try it once more.

You borrowed his surf board and was only going on baby waves to test out surfing. Despite the waves being the size of a "pea" in Paul's opinion, to you, they were massive. Although it was your first time, you were doing really good thanks to Paul's help.

So once again, you made your way towards another wave as Paul cheered. Although there were other families at the beach, Paul didn't care and continued to shout praises as you rode a small wave. If he could, he would have recorded you like a proud parent.

The entire day, he's been glued to your side as he helped you learn how to stand on a board, swim you back to shore, and give you handfuls of compliments on your surfing and looks. Even though you felt bald with your hair wet and slightly insecure in your bathing suit, he always made sure to tell you to shut up as he gives you a kiss.

You always thought you couldn't fall deeper for him, but you always did. And the same goes for him: watching you smile, hearing your proud giggles as you say "I did it!" to him, and seeing you without any makeup in a nice swimsuit - he'd marry you right then and there if he could.

Pepe Marti | 21 there's no beach photos of him :(

Swimming was something Pepe only did if he had the proper gear. Not in the cool way, like swim caps or a nice pair of swim trunks. But instead in the loser way, in which he NEEDED his stupid little kid googles and his stupid baby paddle board.

So, as you hurriedly slap sunscreen on him before he ran off, he snapped his dumbass googles onto his face. Just like a dog, he dived into the water and as you looked at the beach, you realized he had matching googles with a different little kid who looked roughly 7 year olds.

And despite being roughly 7 year old, the little boy gave Pepe a weird look, silently saying "Aren't you too old for this?" You couldn't help but snicker under your breathe as you walked calmly towards Pepe, who was splashing around as if he was drowning.

"(Y/N)!" He said excitedly as he handed you his paddle board. "Let's play a game!!" A large smile was on his face, making it impossible for you to say no.

"Okay, what game?" You said with a sweet smile.

"Let's see who can hold their breathe the longest!!!" He said excitedly, before you could agree he started a countdown. "3, 2, 1 GO!"

You watched as his head dived into the water as he held his nose. Little did he know, you weren't under the water...

Zak O'Sullivan | 02

Day time at the beach was something Zak liked, but didn't love. He liked the view, the sound of the waves, and seeing all the happy families. But he hated the sand betting stuck between his toes, the way his hair would get dried out from the sea salt, and the cold breeze that hit him while wet. It just wasn't his style, he'd much rather go to a pool than a beach.

But one thing that he did love, was late night bonfires with his friend group on the beach. Roasting s'mores as you talked with everyone, wrapped in a big jacket as you laughed at stupid stories. It was much more fun than splashing in the water in Zak's opinion.

As you chatted with his friend group, who gladly accepted you into their group, you felt his hand snake around your waist. His head rests on your shoulder, his warm breathe hitting your neck slightly. He felt comfortable around his friends, enough to be affectionate with you.

You smiled, having any of him touch you was an instant way to make you happy. And you smiled even wider as you realized his spare hand reached in front of you, holding a perfectly cooked s'more just for you.

If making a perfect s'more was a competition, Zak would win every time. You laughed at his surprise offer, taking it from his hands as you took a bite. Chocolate was perfectly melted, the graham cracker was lightly warm from the gooey marshmallow.

You felt his hand pull back from your waist, signaling he was going to go back to cooking. On instinct, you grab his hand, placing it back onto your waist. You gave his a small look, that was a silent way of asking him to stay instead of cooking like a manic.

He smiled at you, shaking his head gently as he then placed both hands on your waist as he nuzzled his head into your neck slightly. But it tickled slightly, you laughed as you tried to push him away. But his grip on your waist was stronger as he pulled you in closer to him as he continued to tickle you. His friend group didn't even cringe, only looking away and murmuring how they've never seen him be so soft and gentle.

But he would always be soft and gentle with you, how could he not?

Jak Crawford | 07

Despite how cheesy it is, he loves walking on the beach. Of course he loves the water and jumping in, but he loves talking to you whilst looking at the beach. Watching the light hit you and making you look as if you were sent from heaven. What can he say, he's a big "girlfriend" guy.

Even cuter, is his ambition to find the prettiest shell for his pretty girlfriend. As you chat and walk alongside the shore, laughing at stupid jokes and stories, he'll randomly freeze. He grabs a shell, runs to the ocean to quickly rinse it off and see if it's worthy of giving to you: which is always.

As you walk further along the shore, you're struggling to hold all of the little shells he's gathered for you. But you don't have the heart to tell him to stop. His small gasp when he sees a shell, and then his goofy smile as he runs back to you - how could you ever tell him to stop?

So once again, he handed you yet another shell with a bright smile on his face. Once again, you smiled back and accepted his offer, barely able to hold onto it. As you struggle to walk and hold all the shells, Jak notices and frowns.

"Let me hold some," He says gently, hand reaching out as he grabs a few of the shells he just handed you. As he takes some of the weight, you both continue to walk, giggling and laughing at his stupid jokes and stories once more.

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mostlysignssomeportents · 10 months ago

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Kickstarting “The Bezzle” audiobook, sequel to Red Team Blues

I'm heading to Berlin! On January 29, I'll be delivering Transmediale's Marshall McLuhan Lecture, and on January 30, I'll be at Otherland Books (tickets are limited! They'll have exclusive early access to the English edition of The Bezzle and the German edition of Red Team Blues!).

I'm kickstarting the audiobook for The Bezzle, the sequel to last year's Red Team Blues, featuring Marty Hench, a hard-charging, two-fisted forensic accountant who spent 40 years in Silicon Valley, busting every finance scam hatched by tech bros' feverish imaginations:

http://thebezzle.org

Marty Hench is a great character to write. His career in high-tech scambusting starts in the early 1980s with the first PCs and stretches all the way to the cryptocurrency era, the most target-rich environment for scamhunting tech has ever seen. Hench is the Zelig of tech scams, and I'm having so much fun using him to probe the seamy underbelly of the tech economy.

Enter The Bezzle, which will be published by Tor Books and Head of Zeus on Feb 20: this adventure finds Marty in the company of Scott Warms, one of the many bright technologists whose great startup was bought and destroyed by Yahoo! (yes, they really used that asinine exclamation mark). Scott is shackled to the Punctuation Factory by golden handcuffs, and he's determined to get fired without cause, so he can collect his shares and move onto the next thing.

That's how Scott and Marty find themselves on Catalina island, the redoubt of the Wrigley family, where bison roam the hills, yachts bob in the habor and fast food is banned. Scott invites Marty on a series of luxury vacations on Catalina, which end abruptly when they discover – and implode – a hamburger-related Ponzi scheme run by a real-estate millionaire who is destroying the personal finances of the Island's working-class townies out of sheer sadism.

Scott's victory is bittersweet: sure, he blew up the Ponzi scheme, but he's also made powerful enemies – the kinds of enemies who can pull strings with the notoriously corrupt LA County Sheriff's Deputies who are the only law on Catalina, and after taking a pair of felony plea deals, Scott gets the message and never visits Catalina Island again.

That could have been the end of it, but California's three-strikes law – since rescinded – means that when Scott picks up one more felony conviction for some drugs discovered during a traffic stop, he's facing life in prison.

That's where The Bezzle really gets into gear.

At its core, The Bezzle is a novel about the "shitty technology adoption curve": the idea that our worst technological schemes are sanded smooth on the bodies of prisoners, mental patients, kids and refugees before they work their way up the privilege gradient and are inflicted on all of us:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/12/algorithmic-wage-discrimination/#fishers-of-men

America's prisons are vicious, brutal places, and technology has only made them worse. When Scott's prison swaps out in-person visits, the prison library, and phone calls for a "free" tablet that offers all these services as janky apps that cost ten times more than they would on the outside, the cruelty finds a business model.

Working inside and outside the prison Marty Hench and Scott Warms figure out the full nature of the scam that the captive audience of prisoners are involuntary beta-testers for, and they discover a sprawling web of real-estate fraud, tech scams, and offshore finance that is extracting fortunes from the hides of America's prisoners and their families. The criminals who run that kind of enterprise aren't shy about fighting for what they've got, and they're more than happy to cut some of LA County's notorious deputy gangs in for a cut in exchange for providing some kinetic support for the project.

The Bezzle is exactly the kind of book I was hoping I'd get to write when I kicked off the Hench series – one that decodes the scam economy, from music royalties to prison videoconferencing, real estate investment trusts to Big Four accounting firm bogus audits. It's both a fast-moving, two-fisted crime novel and a masterclass on how the rich and powerful get away with both literal and figurative murder.

It's getting a big push from both my publishers and I'll be touring western Canada and the US with it. The early reviews are spectacular. But despite all of this, I had to make my own audiobook for it, which I'm pre-selling on Kickstarter:

http://thebezzle.org

Why? Because Audible – Amazon's monopoly gatekeeper to the audiobook world, with more than 90% of the market – refuses to carry my work.

Audible uses Digital Rights Management to lock every audiobook they sell to their platform. Legally, only an Audible-authorized app can decrypt and play the audiobooks they sell you. Distributing a tool that removes Audible DRM is a felony under Section 1201 of the 1998 DMCA.

That means that if you break up with Audible – delete your Audible apps – you will lose your entire audiobook library. And the fact that you're Audible's hostage makes the writers you love into their hostages, too. Writers understand that if they leave the Audible platform, their audience will have to choose between following them, or losing all their audiobooks.

That's how Audible gets away with abusing its performers and writers, up to and including the $100m Audiblegate wage-theft scandal:

https://www.audiblegate.com/

Audible can steal $100m from its writers…and the writers still continue to sell on the platform, because leaving will cost them their audience.

This is canonical enshittification: lock in users, then screw suppliers. Lots of companies abuse DRM to do this, but none can hold a candle to Amazon, who understand that the DMCA is a copyright law that protects corporations at the expense of creators.

Under DMCA 1201 commercial distribution of a "circumvention device" carries a five-year prison sentence and a $500,000 fine. That means that if I write a book, pay to have it recorded, and then sell it to you through Audible, I am criminally prohibited from giving you the tool to take it from Audible to another platform. Even though I hold the copyright to that work, I would face a harsher sentence than you would if you simply pirated the audiobook from some darknet site. Not only that: if you shoplifted the audiobook in CD form, you'd get a lighter sentence than I, the copyright holder, would receive for giving you a tool to unlock it from Amazon's platform! Hell, if you hijacked the truck that delivered the CD, you'd get off lighter than I would. This is a scam straight out of a Marty Hench novel.

This is batshit. I won't allow it. My books are licensed on the condition that they must not be sold with DRM. Which means that Audible won't sell my books, which means that my publishers are thoroughly disinterested in paying thousands of dollars to produce audiobooks of my titles. A book that isn't sold in the one store than accounts for 90% of all sales is unlikely to do well.

That's where you come in. Since 2020, I've used Kickstarter to pre-sell five of my audiobooks (I wrote nine books during lockdown!). All told, I've raised over $750,000 (gross! but still!) on these crowdfunders. More than 20,000 backers have pitched in! The last two of these books – The Internet Con and The Lost Cause – were national bestsellers.

This isn't just a way for me to pay off a lot of bills and put away something for retirement – it's proof that readers care about supporting writers and don't want to be locked in by a giant monopolist that depends on its drivers pissing in bottles to make quota.

It's a powerful message about the desire for something better than Amazon. It's part of the current that is driving the FTC to haul Amazon into court for being a monopolist, and also part of the inspiration for other authors to try treating Amazon as damage and routing around it, with spectacular results:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/dragonsteel/surprise-four-secret-novels-by-brandon-sanderson

And I'm doing it again. Last December, I went into Skyboat Media's studios where Gabrielle De Cuir directed @wilwheaton, who reprised his role as Marty Hench for the audiobook of The Bezzle. It came out amazing:

https://archive.org/details/bezzle-sample

Now I'm pre-selling this audiobook, as well as the ebook and hardcover for The Bezzle. I'm also offering bundles with the ebook and audiobook for Red Team Blues (naturally these are all DRM-free). You can get your books signed and personalized and shipped anywhere in the world, courtesy of Book Soup, and I've partnered with Libro.fm to deliver DRM-free audiobooks with an app for people who don't want to mess around with sideloading.

I've also got some spendy options for high rollers. There's three chances to name a character in the next Hench novel (Picks and Shovels, Feb 2025). There's also five chances to commission a Hench short story about your favorite tech scam, and get credited when the story is published.

The Kickstarter runs for the next three weeks, which should give me time to get the hardcopy books signed and shipped to arrive around the on-sale date. What's more, I've finally worked out all the post-Brexit kinks with shipping my UK publisher's books to EU backers. I'm working with Otherland Books to fulfill those EU orders, and it looks like I'm going to be able to sign a giant stack of those when I'm in Berlin later this month to give the annual Marshall McLuhan lecture at the Canadian embassy:

https://transmediale.de/en/2024/event/mcluhan-2024

Red Team Blues and its sequels are some of the most fun – and informative – work I've done in my quarter-century career. I love how they blend technical explanations of the scam economy with high-intensity technothrillers. That's the the same mix as my bestselling YA series Little Brother series – but these are firmly adult novels.

The Bezzle came out great. I hope you'll give it a try – and that you'll come out to see me in late February when I hit the road with the book! Here's that Kickstarter link again:

http://thebezzle.org

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/10/the-bezzle/#marty-hench

#pluralistic #kickstarter #audible #the bezzle #bezzles #prison tech #disciplinary technology #crowdfunding #wilw #wil wheaton #audiobooks #publishing #science fiction #marty hench #martin hench #red team blues #shitty technology adoption curve #reits

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pictureamoebae · 1 year ago

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USING RELIGHT FOR RESHADE - a tutorial by amoebae

[You can also find this tutorial over at imgur and patreon]

ReLight is a premium shader for ReShade made by Marty's Mods (Pascal Gilcher). It allows you to add four new lights to your scene that help illuminate, and create realism and drama. To download and use ReLight you need to subscribe to the Path Tracers tier on Gilcher's Patreon to get access to the iMMERSE Ultimate package of shaders. Once subscribed, you'll be prompted to link your Patreon account to discord, and then you'll be granted access to his discord server, and, most importantly, to the Path Tracers discussion channel and the Downloads Level 2 channel, which is where you will find ReLight (along with the other premium shaders included in that tier).

Be sure to also download the up-to-date free iMMERSE shader package, because you'll need the Launchpad shader and some of the other included files.

The following guide is for the older qUINT_relight.fx version of ReLight. The latest version of ReLight is MartysMods_RELIGHT.fx, released on 31st December 2023. Many of the settings have changed in the newer version, but you can still use this guide to help understand how to enable and position lights. The guide will be updated/rewritten once I've had time to properly play around with the new version. You can continue to use the older version if you'd prefer.

When you turn on ReLight in the ReShade menu you'll be greeted with these settings. Yours may look different because I've used it a lot and it remembers your last settings.

Take a look at the settings at the top.

Use Smooth Normals = On

Trace Shadows = On

Filter Shadows = On

Use Temporal Supersampling = On

Shadow Mode = Trace All

Shadow Quality = Ultra (change this if you get bad performance)

Shadow Sharpness = I have mine set around 0.65 but you can play around with whatever looks best

Z Thickness = Play around with this too. It controls how realistically shadows fall on and around objects

At the very bottom of the settings is Visualize Light Position. Turn this on so you can easily see where your lights are.

Now we can turn on one of our lights. Remember, it remembers your previous settings so yours will look different to mine the first time you use it.

Under Light 0 check the Active box.

You should see a big circle appear somewhere on the screen. If you have any object close enough to it, you should see them get brighter. If nothing is close to the circle you may not see any difference.

You can see a difference between this screenshot and the last - Shadowheart's face is brighter.

Now it's time to move the light where we want it and change it to a colour we like.

Under the Active box you'll see a row of 3 boxes containing numbers, next to the word Position. These control the coordinates of your circle of light in relation to the screen. You can place your mouse inside these boxes and move it while holding down left-click to change the value a little like a slider.

Left box = moves the circle left/right

Middle box = moves the circle up/down

Right box = moves the circle forward/back

In this shot I've moved the circle of light over to the right and a little further back so it better illuminates the front of Shadowheart's face.

Next you can choose the colour of your light.

In the row below Position you'll see it says Tint. Click on the coloured box next to Tint and it will bring up the colour picker you see in the screenshot. Choose your colour from here. Click anywhere in the main ReShade menu to close the colour picker.

I adjusted the position and the tint a little more until I had it exactly where I wanted it. You can see a darker circle now over in the top right of the screen (my mouse cursor is hovering over it to make it easier to see).

You can use the Intensity slider (directly below Tint) to control how bright the light should be.

You may need to go back and forth between the Position, Tint, and Intensity settings until you get just the right effect.

Here's a reminder of what the picture looks like without that added light. Compare it to the screenshot above to see how great our new little light has been at helping illuminate Shadowheart.

You can turn individual lights on and off whenever you want by checking or unchecking the Active box next to the light in question. It will save your settings.

Now I want to add a second light. I've moved my ReShade window over a little so I can see what I'm doing.

I turned on the Active box under Light 1, and positioned my new light where I wanted it. Look over to the left of the statue in the background. You'll see my mouse cursor, and directly above it is a tiny blue circle. That's our second light!

The further you move the light away from the camera (using the right-hand box under Position) the smaller the circle gets, because it's further away!

I made this light blue, and I turned the intensity up quite high. This has helped illuminate the statue and added nice shadows that help give it some depth.

Here's a screenshot to remind you what everything looks like without any of the ReLight lights I added.

And here's a screenshot showing how everything looks with ReLight turned on and my two lights in action. I chose a subtle effect because I just wanted to draw attention to Shadowheart's face and to the statue behind her.

When you close the ReShade menu the circles that helped you know where your lights were will go away, but the light they cast will remain. Notice how you can't see the two circles in this shot?

You can also uncheck the Visualize Light Position box if you want to hide the circles while keeping the ReShade menu open. This can be helpful if they're obscuring parts of the scene that you need to see while you continue editing.

---

And that's it! You can add up to 4 lights and control them independently from one another. You can use them to just help illuminate a character for a portrait, to add drama with bold lighting, or to increase the realism of a scene with better shadows and light falling where you would expect it to. If you have a big fiery sword you can add a light to it that makes orange light cast onto the character who is holding it, which can look really cool. The only limit is your imagination.

(If I ever learn how to make videos I'll translate this tutorial into an easier format, but for now I hope this helps.)

#reshade faq #relight faq #reshade tutorial #relight tutorial

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anna-neko · 4 months ago

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and then they made it worse .... but sure a robot in the pool would do so great

I really hate this robot

#customer service hell #Marty the robot #sure he's a hella annoying during daytime #but at asscrack of dawn he turns on VERY BRIGHT LIGHT and scans shelves #and yes one of these costs more than my annual pay #there's been more than enuff dumb articles about it

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gremlingottoosilly · 1 year ago

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Cabin in the woods (yan!slasher!Konig x fem!Reader x yan!slasher!Horangi) part 4

You wake up in the murderer's den. Things can only go downhill from here - especially when one of the killers expresses an unusual interest in you. WARNINGS: Blood, dub-con, threats of intimacy, general slasher-y, a bit of knife play

All things considered, Horangi has won at life.

He has a boyfriend – an amazing boyfriend, a bit older, a soon-to-be-husband, and his best friend in one tight package. They share hobbies, they share views on the world – practically everything that they can talk about, they share with each other. It’s a perfect relationship, especially considering where they met and how they were at first.

He has an amazing job in doing private contracts with his boyfriend – some people may call them killers for hire, war criminals, and monsters draped in a uniform, but Horangi likes to call himself a promising immigrant entrepreneur who works for no one but himself and enjoys having most days off.

He has an amazing, big house in the middle of picture-perfect Austrian wilderness, with every room dedicated to his or his partner’s tastes and hobbies, and that is literally four times as big as any of the apartments he rented previously.

He has an amazing hobby that allows him to combine hiking, shooting, and socializing – and König shares this hobby with him, actively supporting and engaging with it.

So, when he drains the blood from his knife – too bad the perfect lil’ victim isn’t here to clean it with her tongue – and starts to look for the remaining group of dumb tourists, deciding to head home just for a minute or two, to see if some of the prey would accidentally found it, he…

Fuck.

*** You woke up with a throbbing headache. Not surprising, considering you were hit in the back of your head with a force that would be enough to turn your brain into a scramble. You slowly opened your eyes, surprised that you weren’t blindfolded, and gently, slowly tried to move your head around to see the room better. Bright light coming from the doorway immediately made you ill, nauseous. You close your eyes and groan, feeling the pain only intensifying.

You’re very surprised to feel a cold cloth being slowly put on your burning forehead – you’d expect to be hanging from a meathook and have your buttocks eaten by a pack of wild creatures beyond your comprehension.

— Tssh, Scatzi, don’t move. Hit you in the head too hard, ja? Good thing you won’t need it anyway.

You hear the voice – not masked, not changed from multiple layers of different material – clean, unfiltered voice. That familiar boyish tone and deep gruff of a man from the corner shop – the tall one, the most mysterious one, the one that made you paranoid for the whole journey with his remarks.

God, you feel stupid.

It’s just like in slashers – the killers are always the weird guys who you meet at the start of the movie or some force from the legends you hear about this place. You feel dumb, you feel weak, you feel like you’re going to throw up because the big man – the one that shot Marty with a fucking crossbow – is gently caressing your forehead with his hands, smearing blood and grime all over your skin. You want to puke.

— Wh…whatever you’re doing, m…make it quick.

You can on ly master this, your lips are too dry for something else. You wanted to ask him different questions – where are you, who the fuck are he, what are his goals and mommy issues that made him prey on innocent young adults just having a shitty getaway in the forest, but you remember the other guy’s reaction to dumb questions – you want to die quickly, not slowly and painfully.

— Ach, Hase. Eager, are you?

This…isn’t the answer you were hoping for. His hands slowly creep down your face, pinching your cheeks – he touches the softer parts of your mouth, and your nose, tugs on your ears, and does whatever he can to just feel your features in his fingers, which makes everything only creepier. He pushes a finger past your lips – you want to bite it, but he only laughs at your pathetic attempts.

He tells you something through a laugh that makes your head hurt more. Something about how Horangi was right about you being a kitten – that you bite just like one. You feel embarrassment spreading across the heat of your cheeks, knowing that your best attacks are only an amusement for your captor.

His hands then move down, slowly. He pushes it under your shirt – and here is where you really start to panic. You’re mostly fine with getting killed, even in a weird and somehow funny, theatrical way, but you don’t…you don’t want to handle this before he eventually strangles you to death. You sob, your face twitches in pain-stricken expressions – tears only make your head hurt more, but you just can’t stop yourself.

The guy – he still wears a hood, just not the weird thing that makes his voice change – only laughs and plays with your chest, squeezing and touching it with his huge, bear-like hands. He is relentless in not caring about your well-being, and you don’t want to give him the satisfaction of breaking you, but tears just won’t stop flowing, and the heat in your belly, provoked by that unwanted affection, grows more with every second.

His touches aren’t painful – but you wish they were. He is observing your body, studies it with his hands and you don’t like it one bit. Too rough, too strong for you, he has manners of a forest troll and, to be honest, in that stupid hood of his, he looks just like one. You’d jump from the bed and run to the nearest exit, but your head is still throbbing, and you still tied up to the bedpost. God, this is embarrassing.

— You’re trembling like a virgin, Schatz. Are you sure that your friend was a whore and not you?

König laughs, looking at the perfect display under him. Yes, yes, he knows that Horangi will be pissed with how he sped up the story and decided to keep you in their house, but he is sure he can't convince his pretty boyfriend that it’s all for the best. They need a toy – precious darling, something weak and helpless, something innocent to bite into. You are a good runner, to his surprise, but your fight is as miserable as your expression – you can’t put up a good fight and he fucking lives for each second of that.

— Stop touching me! — Are you going to stop me? — I…

— I love trembling prey. You look so perfect under me, Hase, I don’t think you’d stand a chance.

Of course, he is a hunk of a man – a wall of muscles, brutal strength, and nothing but raw power, so even if you were an Olympic champion in fistfights, you probably wouldn’t stand a chance against him anyway. He is trained to kill, he is training everyone else to kill – and he needs some snacks for how good the hunt was. Two dumb tourists, killed on the first night in the woods – and with others still having no fucking idea. God, it makes his dick hard.

König pushes his hand under your shirt and finds where your tits are concealed with a bra – sports one, really nice, he thinks, but you’d look much better in blood-stained lace. He yanks that stupid thing off your chest – your nipples are hardening almost immediately, even under your shirt. Ah, looks like he forgot to turn on the heater.

Well, you have to get the heat from his body then.

— S…stop, please.

— You like it. Why should I stop?

— I don’t like it!

His other hand goes to run a finger across your soaked, heated panties. The rough texture of the glove fabric is grazing your labia, and touching your gentle, wet folds makes you squirm and cry even more under him – he knows you hate it, embarrassed to be this aroused for the hands of a killer, but he just can’t fucking resist. He knows your hands are tied firmly to the bedpost, he knows you won’t be able to escape even if he’d leave the room right now – so he slowly removes his hand from your panties, showing you the glistening, wet material of his gloves.

He licks your wetness from his fingers – and you let go of a half-moan, half-cry, disgust mixed with fear and pouring into delicious feelings of complete devastation. Poor thing, so scared under him – so embarrassed of your arousal, he just fucking knows you aren’t like your friends. You’re still dumb, of course, with how you agreed to go to this forest even after all of his attempts to say that this is dangerous, but you’re also pretty, adorable, and don’t try to either attack or seduce him or Horangi – and he had a fair share of people who were trying to do both, until they’d found out he is a masked killer for real, and not just for the slasher season atmosphere.

You’re a little rabbit on his slicing board – and the knife appears in his hand too quickly for you to even start panicking. The blade lingers on your skin, slowly removing such silly, useless things like shirts and modesty, closing your skin just enough to burn a little, but not enough to do real damage. He killed more than 100 men with his knife, and skinned alive more than at least a dozen – König knows how to operate, especially when you’re bound and scared into submission.

— Ko, what the fuck are you doing?

Ach, Horangi is here. Finally, he just started to worry that those dumb tourists have learned how to fight back and now are trying to fuck with his partner. It would be funny to look at, of course, but he still doesn’t want anything to happen to him – so he sighs with relief when he sees a familiar masked figure in the doorframe. Then he remembers that he wasn’t supposed to take in pets so soon.

Fuck.

— I thought we agreed to not take her so quickly.

Horangi takes a step further, watching as your eyes are pleading with him for help. You’re adorable – praying for help from your tormentor, so sweetly broken already that he can barely contain himself. You’re adorable, but he isn’t in the mood of playing with victims nicely, and he is still a bit pissed off at König for ruining the promise he gave him. Not the best attitude in an honest relationship, especially when you are trying to introduce a new member of those relationships. Honestly, sometimes Hong-jin was thinking about hiring a couple of therapists. And then killing him after extracting every answer. Totally normal behavior.

— I know, but…she fell into my hands. Couldn’t say no to an opportunity.

He knows that König is grinning under his hood – his eyes are gleaming with happiness as he just got his new favorite toy on a silver platter. Horangi melts a little bit at seeing him this happy – the latest couple of missions weren’t the best, so this hunt got to be good. And so far, it is.

— You killed the stoner?

— Ja, was easy. Surprised he died from a bolt in the head, he didn’t seem like a guy who has much up there.

God, his sense of humor is fucked up – Horangi laughs for a good few seconds, not even trying to contain his emotions. You are still on the bed, your hands are tied to the post, rough ropes sit too tightly on your wrists, already angry red from all of your struggling. God, you’re looking delicious, covered in the blood of your friends, crying and looking like their own little death goddess. He knows he shouldn’t give up on temptation – and he also knows that he wants to fuck you.

Laying here, without a top, with a wet stain on your jeans from your own arousal, you don’t even know how delicious you look. How hard it is for both of them, to stop looking at you like a horny dog and just do their thing. Killing thing, that is. Yes, they suppose to kill their victims, not tie them up to the bed and think about burying their cocks deep in your welcoming, wet pussy.

Fuck, he has to be stronger than this. Killing is okay, torturing is okay, maybe kissing his boyfriend on top of the rotting, dead bodies is okay, but he just knows that he can’t start touching you because he would lose control and they might spend the whole night taking you from one dick to another, instead of doing what they have to.

Maybe, just a little touch would be okay. Like a gamble, russian roulette in trying to see if he would be able to contain himself. Like Horangi had such great luck at anything that is connected to gambling.

— We can’t keep her here.

— Why? I would feed her and walk her once in a while.

You whine, and König immediately goes to cover your mouth with his hand. You cry even more, feeling the filthy taste of your juices, blood, and dirt enveloping your tongue and making you want to gag. This is digesting, he is disgusting, you hate nature, wilderness, and this fucking country. If you were to get out of this place, you’d beg every oil company in the world to make the biggest fucking gasoline refining factory out of this forest.

— What about the police? She can call them.

— No signal.

— She could scream for help.

— We can cut off her tongue.

— She wouldn’t be able to suck our dicks then.

— Oh. Scheisse.

— Exactly. We can’t keep her here.

— But you said that we can…

— Not now, I mean. Having a kitten like ‘er at home makes me want to stay inside and fuck her whole day, not running around after her stupid friends.

König finally gets it – and Horangi is right, much to his dismay. You are a distracting little thing, getting into the killer’s layer too early. Adorable and weak, keeping you inside would be the best option – but they still need a bit of space to guy your friends in the basement, so keeping you inside would make you…nervous. Scared. Not a pleasurable type of scared, you can go crazy from horror and then turn into a useless, empty sex doll. König would still brush your hair and love you nonetheless, but it would be a waste to keep you like this.

Then, again, it would make it easier for you three to have sex…

— That’s also true. But I already cut her clothes.

— We can let her run for a bit. Make her friends panic, fuckin’ civvies aren’t even aware that two of their friends kicked the bucket.

— Doubt they care about each other that much.

— Good thing we got involved, right?

Horangi’s hand gently pats on your head – you wince from pain and he slightly moves the cold cloth on your forehead. The movement is similar to how people are petting cats – you hate it, you feel your legs preparing to kick him in the direction of his dick – but König presses on your ankles before you could do anything. Asshole.

— Need to do something with her shirt tho.

— She’d look adorable in mine.

— Yeah. Would cover her too much tho…I miss looking at boobs like this.

— You have them, no?

— It’s pecs. if anything, yours are bigger than mine.

They both laugh – you are munching on König’s hand more actively, trying to get this out of your mouth. They talk like you aren’t even here and your eyes are filled with tears again – from humiliation, from fear, from desire to run away because they don’t even consider you an enemy and you just want to get out, as soon as possible. They look almost normal together – like two loving partners discussing the latest news and hobbies, not a pair of psycho killers who almost made you hot and bothered for their stupid, definitely not attractive, masks.

You’re topless, barely wearing your jeans and panties – not exactly the best outfit for running through the forest. Would attract attention, of course, but you could also catch a cold, and they can’t exactly fuck a sniffing, coughing darling who is too sick to understand which hole are they using and what type of knife is plunging in her tender, open skin.

König throws a shirt on you – it’s musky, covered in mysterious stains, smells exactly like him, and a bit of pine tree. It’s such a typical red flannel that it makes you gag from the stereotype – but it covers your boobs and he is even polite enough to slowly untie one of your hands, firmly keeping it in place to get you into the sleeves and…

Once he had two of your hands in his grasp, you bit on his glove especially hard, kicking him in the groin again – this time, not even bothering to hear his moans. You jump to the floor, barely seeing anything as your view is darkening with a throbbing headache. You have to master everything you have to not throw up on their boots – and you ignore their disappointed yelps as you duck under the shorter guy’s hands and run to…you don’t even know where to run, you just know that you are not staying with the people who are treating you like a fucking lure to get the rest of your friends.

You can’t go to your friends – you already saw just how much they don’t want to listen to you. You can’t call the police and you can’t return to the camp because then the killers would know where all of your stuff and your friends are. The only chance you have is to fight them off – which is already proved itself as a Bad Fucking Idea(™. All right reserves to Amazon, you got your critical thinking skills during an online sale), so you need to find a distraction – or a weapon.

You’re literally in the house of murderers. If horror movies taught you anything, it’s that those kinds of houses are usually filled with the weapons of crime – or extensively sharp deer antlers.

You run to the second floor, dropping something behind your back – trying to get as much distance between you and them as possible, you crawl on the stairs, holding your head in poor attempts of soothing the pain. Their house is…normal.

Posters, paintings, some weird fucking shit like anime girls with cat ears staring at you with their bigass eyes and even bigger boobs – one of them had a knife plunging right into her chest, kinda making you feel it was more like target practice than fap material. You drop a big Lego set behind you, and the guy – bigger one, you still don’t have their names and you don’t want to know them – is yelling something about 12 hours put into that thing. Good. You can at least do psychological damage.

The house is as normal as a killer’s den can be – no weapons lying around, no knives just kinda lying there, much to your disappointment. Inflation is real, even serial killers can’t afford to just have their guns lying around like they used to. Fuck, this used to be a proper country. Fuck, you used to spend your days at home, not running away from masked killers who are keeping their houses cozy and tidy and honestly kinda clean even if this has sort of man cave vibe, which is totally understandable and adorable if…

Shit, you got distracted. Dead people, dead people, dead people, you can’t allow your natural drive to strong partners and masks to make you forget about the…death of very annoying and honestly plain mean people who were making your life worse actively every day and who had it coming anyway, but they still didn’t deserve such horrible death without even letting their parents know where their remains lie and…

Before your brain could master more annoying thoughts, you pushed to an open door. There has to be something you can use – pills, knives, guns, remains of the previous victims that can be sharpened and used against them so you can let them how it is to be violently penetrated for once! Come to think of it, judging by how cozy they were with each other, they probably already get penetrated a lot…ah, diversity wins, your murderers are bisexual and fine with polyamory.

You open the door, pushing it with all of your body weight – and you fall, only barely able to protect your face with your trembling, shaky hands. God, you’re miserable.

— Shatzen found a way into our bedroom. You sure we can’t keep her, Tigeren?

— It would be boring, no?

— We can use her for a bit and then let go. Make her show us where her friends are.

König sits right next to you, patting your head.

— Braves Mädchen, so smart. Didn’t know such smart girls were going on such dumb field trips.

— Can she be the smart one in the group then?

— Well, she did go to the woods alone. So smart.

They both laugh again – you grit your teeth, saving every bit of strength you still have in your body, to just push from the ground and get on your legs again. You can do this, you can still run away, you just need to try and push further, a little bit, just a few steps more, just…

König slaps your ass, hard enough to send you on the floor again. You groan, both from pain and humiliation.

— Dumb girl. Do you really think you can be this adorable and expect us to just contain ourselves?

— I…I…

— What is that, kitten? You want to apologize for running away? Want to beg us to save your friends?

— I…f-fuck you. Both of you.

Another harsh slap – the other guy gets his hand in your hair, tugging it just enough to make you groan from the headache again.

— Oh, this is exactly what you are going to do.

A noise from outside of the house startled you both. You hear Max’s voice – annoying as always, that know-it-all tone that usually makes your blood boil, but what sends happy shivers down your spine. You were found! Finally, at least one of the group is smart enough to find you and distract the killers so you can both run away and…

Oh god, Max is outside and yelling, he is definitely alone and they both are muscular, big gues with a bunch of weapons and you as a hostage and…shit.

— Go on, Katzen. Scream for him, ja? Lure the mouse in.

You grit your teeth, yelling out the best “Get the fuck out of here, it’s not safe” as you can.

They laugh.

The world finally turns to black with another season of silly girl falling conscious in the best plot moments.

#konig x reader #yandere konig #cod x reader #cod #call of duty #cod x you #konig mw2 #reader insert #yandere cod #yandere x reader #horangi x you #horangi #horangi x könig #horangi x reader #konig

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gooondocks · 4 months ago

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no one's ever had me (not like you) — evan buckley.

writing masterlist | askbox

─── summary: when buck meets his high school sweetheart at the ten-year reunion, he learns that their lives may be very different now, but the spark is still there.

─── pairing: evan buckley x gn!reader.

─── warnings & notes: fluffy fluff. no use of y/n, i'm british so probably inaccurate depiction of high school reunions. based on the song 'so high school' by taylor swift bc i heard it and couldn't stop thinking of this idea. crappy ending bc i suck at wrapping things up. enjoy!!!

─── word count: 2.1k.

"DO YOU THINK ANYONE'S DONE US all a favour and spiked the punch yet?"

When the email appeared in his inbox a few months ago — an e-vite, of all things, complete with the kind of graphic design prowess he hasn't seen since the early 2000s — Buck had been pretty intent on ignoring it.

A hundred excuses had bubbled up in the back of his mind, because honestly, the thought of heading back to his hometown to attend a high school reunion made his skin itch. Trapping himself in a sweaty gymnasium, surrounded by dozens of almost-strangers engaged in a vanity contest of 'who's the most successful?' coupled with a shitty DJ blasting 2010's greatest hits?

It's really not what he'd call a good time.

Even if he could've talked himself into it, sharing a ZIP code with his parents for even a day or two was more than he was willing to tolerate. He'd left Hershey in his rearview almost a decade ago, and there's not a fragment of his whole being that regrets it for even a second.

Except.

Except the dates lined up with one of his rare weekends off work. Except when he looked up the flights online, just to see, he'd stumbled across a deal so cheap Buck honestly thought he was hallucinating for a moment.

Except Evan Buckley believes in signs from the universe, and when Maddie gives him that look over lunch one day, even though Buck had absolutely not mentioned the reunion to anyone, it's the final nail in the coffin for him.

He booked the tickets. He told the team he'd be out of town for the weekend, and bought a new shirt, and now he's standing in his old high school gymnasium. He wrinkles his nose at the smell, that sweat-and-hormones stink that never really goes away, and you're sidling up to him at the refreshments table, and the speakers are blaring an old Ke$ha song he hasn't heard in years.

For a moment, he's seventeen again. The sound of your voice slips over his skin like a cool breeze in the desert and suddenly it could be the night of junior prom, and the pair of you have sequestered yourselves in a shadowy corner, laughing at the committee's subpar attempt at an 'Under the Sea' theme.

Buck blinks, and he isn't seventeen, but he flashes you a wide smile anyway as you help yourself to a glass of bright red punch.

"Hi."

He says the word so quietly, he's surprised you even hear it. But there's a sparkle in your eye as you raise the cup to your lips, and he knows you heard him.

You always could.

The last day Buck ever saw you, he kissed you goodbye before you piled into your dad's old truck and drove out of sight, bound for college and big dreams and a future that didn't include him. Your lips had been damp with tears. On his loneliest nights, Buck swears he can still taste the salt on his tongue.

It's been a decade, but you still look so similar to the wide-eyed kid he fell in love with. Your hair's a little longer, perhaps; there's a scar on your chin that wasn't there before, and the dimples around your smile have deepened, but that's all. You're still you. The thought makes his chest ache a little, but it's a good pain.

He wonders if he's changed much. He wonders what you see when you look at him.

"I suspect it was the first thing Marty Brandt did when he got here," Buck adds, louder this time, and you laugh, and he wonders how he went ten years without hearing that sound. "I didn't think you'd be here. Didn't see your name on the RSVP list."

You shrug. "Jem bullied me into it. Emailed my boss to get the time off and everything."

Even as you try to seem annoyed, a trickle of fondness finds its way into your voice. When Buck follows your gaze to the dance floor, it's hard to miss your childhood best friend throwing shapes to an old Maroon 5 song.

"You two still talk?" He doesn't mean to sound surprised, except...

Well. Staying in touch with high school pals hadn't been a priority when he skipped town. Hard to imagine a single one of his classmates he'd want to stay in touch with. Except you.

A grin tugs at your mouth. "Worse. We work together." You tilt your head, still smiling fondly in Jem's direction. "Tried to shake her off, but she wouldn't let me."

He knows a little about that. "Or was it the other way around?"

"Wouldn't you like to know, Buckley?"

He would, actually. He watches you grimace a little at the flavour of the punch when you take another sip, an adorable twist to your mouth that he once knew so well. A decade ago, the sight of your pout could've made him do anything.

"Tastes like half a bottle of vodka," you tell him, and you take another sip even though he knows you never liked vodka. Remembers playing truth or dare at a party in junior year, and how you threw up in the bushes afterwards.

Buck had held back your hair and tucked you against his side afterward, letting you snuggle into the warmth of him while you slept off the worst of your hangover.

There's a distance between you now, but it's comfortable. Buck tucks his hands into the pockets of his jeans and the pair of you migrate over to a shadowy corner of the gymnasium, away from the prying eyes of your former classmates.

"So," Buck says, as the DJ switches to another song, "how have you been?"

He can't help but wince half a second later. Seriously? How have you been? He's never been to a high school reunion before, but he's seen plenty of movies, and he's pretty sure he's hitting all the marks of being a fucking cliché.

To your credit, you don't laugh at him. Cheeks flushed the prettiest shade of pink Buck has ever seen, you manage to bite back the giggle rising in your throat.

Buck wants to sink through the floor.

"I've been okay," you tell him, swirling your glass of punch absently. The corners of your eyes crinkle a little as you smile at him. "Life, y'know?"

He does. He really fucking does. "Any partners? Kids, spouses, anyone I have to worry about punching me?"

You only mentioned Jem earlier, so it doesn't seem like you brought a date, but he isn't sure he'd love it if he found his partner cosied up in a dark corner with their high school sweetheart.

God, he hopes you didn't bring a date.

There it is, a flash of— something, there and then gone in an instant. Buck hasn't thought about high school in years. Hasn't paid any mind to the friends he left behind. Once or twice, his thoughts have flitted to you, though. The one that got away. Where you are, if you were happy.

When he landed in LA, when he finally settled into his place at the 118, he'd thought of you. He'd hoped you managed to find a place you belonged. A family that loved you like his did.

He thought this would be awkward. Running into you again. Your name hadn't been on the RSVP list, and he'd been so relieved, because what if there was some uneasy tension between you? Buck isn't sure he'd have been able to cope with that.

There aren't a lot of happy memories from his childhood. His adolescence left a lot to be desired, but— you. A bright spot in all that grey.

An uncomfortable reunion might have ruined that. Those memories are cherished, for Buck; locked up tight in his battered heart.

But it's not uncomfortable, or awkward, or uneasy. Ten years and ten seconds have slipped by like sand in an hourglass and he wonders if there's been a moment in the last decade where he felt this at ease.

You sigh at his question, quiet and fond. "There was an engagement," you say after a moment, chewing on your lower lip, "and a break-up. Two years ago, now. Amicable, but..."

"But it still feels like you lost something." Buck knows that feeling intimately. It's been a long time since Abby left him, and even though he's over her, the memory of it still stings sometimes.

You nod. "Yeah. One minute you're going to marry someone, and then you're not. Doesn't really matter why not, in the end. Still hurt a little. Not anymore."

"No?"

You smile at him. "No."

Buck isn't sure how much time passes, how long you both remain huddled in that dark corner as the world continues to move around you. The DJ keeps churning out a series of early-2000s hits that he's fairly sure is just one of those throwback Spotify playlists, and you both make jokes when the Class President gets on stage to give a cheesy speech, and he tells you all about the ill-advised escapades of his early-twenties.

Crashing his bike, dropping out of college. He glosses over the unsavoury parts of his youth, but the way your eyes soften, he knows he isn't fooling you. He never could, not when it mattered. Stories about Peru have you in stitches, and a particularly messy tale about his time as a ranch hand makes you laugh so hard, half a glass of punch ends up your nose.

He missed that. Making you laugh.

Warmth unfurls in his chest when he looks at you. It's the kind of familiarity people associate with coming home, except it was dread he felt stepping off the plane, and uncomfortable memories prickled at him as he drove through the streets of his hometown.

You? You've always been that for him. Warm. Safe. Home.

"You've heard all about my wild twenties. What about you?" he wonders, as the pair of you drift back to the refreshments table, seeking snacks that don't taste like cardboard.

(Buck manages to find a bowl of chips that aren't completely stale, so he'll call that a success.)

"Oh, the usual," you shrug as you refill your glass. "Finished college, got a job and an apartment and a cat and a fiancé. Lost the fiancé, got another cat." You take a moment to flash him your lock screen, a picture of two calico cats curled up on your couch. "Think I traded up there, huh? Anyway, got a new job and moved out West about a year ago."

"Oh, really? Where'd you go?"

"California, actually. I'm in the History department at Berkeley."

He blinks at you once, twice. Something inside his chest goes zing. "I'm in LA!"

"Well maybe I'll have to come down and play tourist for you sometime."

There's a coy tilt to your mouth that he's seen before, and something pleasant skitters down his spine. Your cheeks turn even rosier, and Buck suspects the spiked punch is only partly responsible.

"Maybe you will," he says.

His number hasn't changed since he left Pennsylvania, and maybe that's another sign, too. The shitty music starts to wind down, and his old classmates start to stagger out into the parking lot, and when you kiss his cheek and promise to get in touch, he wonders if there's such a thing as second chances.

It isn't the same. He isn't seventeen and you're different people now. This isn't making out under the bleachers at a football game or skipping class to take a ride on his motorcycle. You're adults now, all grown up with a whole host of other problems, and it isn't the same. It isn't.

Except.

The next day, Buck's phone buzzes right before he boards the flight to Los Angeles. The number isn't familiar, but when he opens the message, he cannot fight the grin that creeps onto his face.

Hope you get home safe. I'd hate to have to find a new tour guide x

It's not the same, because he isn't in high school anymore and neither are you. But as he switches his phone to flight mode and tucks it back into his pocket, a giddy feeling sweeping through his chest, he can't help thinking that maybe this could be better.

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